HOW THE BIBLE CHANGED MY LIFE: Early in our marriage, Anita studied the Bible with Jehovah's Witnesses for a brief time. Then, while I was serving what was to be my final prison sentence, she was again contacted by the Witnesses. It so happened that on the same day, I prayed to God, saying, "If you really exist, prove it to me."
When I was released from prison a few months later, I contacted the local vicar and asked him to study the Bible with me and Anita. He said that he would teach us only church creeds and a prayer.
Finally, I began reading the Bible, I was surprised to learn that the Bible condemns the practice of spiritism. (Deuteronomy 18:10-12) Later, I found a copy of the Watchtower that the Witnesses had left with Anita on the day that I prayed to God for help. What I read moved me to contact the Witnesses.
Our families, our friends and my criminal associates were not happy to learn that we were studying the Bible with Jehovah's Witnesses. Some said that I was being brainwashed. In all honesty, my brain needed washed. I had many personality flaws, a seared conscience, and in addition to other vices, I was smoking up to 60 cigarettes a day. The Witnesses who helped us to learn about the Bible and those with whom we associated in the local congregation were very patient and kind. Eventually, I freed myself of my bad habits. -2 Corinthians 7:1.
HOW I HAVE BENEFITED: Anita and I have been married now for 35 years. One of our children and two of our grandchildren serve Jehovah along with us. In recent years, Anita and I have been able to spend much of our time helping others learn about the Bible.
Serving Jehovah God has given our lives real purpose and meaning. Back in 1970, a judge told the court that I could not be reformed. However, with help from God and guidance from the Bible, I have proved the judge wrong.
Next time: THE BIBLE-Cherished and Suppressed
Watchtower, 2011
6.07.2011
6.06.2011
THE BIBLE CHANGES LIVES
"I have proved the judge wrong"
YEAR BORN: 1954
COUNTRY OF ORIGIN: ENGLAND
HISTORY: VIOLENT CRIMINAL
MY PAST: I was born in Dudley, a large industrial town in the West Midlands. From my childhood, Father instilled in me a love of reading. He also encouraged an appreciation for the marvels of nature, although he attributed those to evolution. He taught me that God did not exist. Even so, my parents sent me to a local Methodist Sunday school.
When I was eight, I saw some local boys set fire to a boat on the canal. The police came, but fear stopped me from talking to them. The boys had threatened me. I was unjustly accused of the crime and became resentful in response, I vandalized some local schools, churches and factories, leaving a trail of destruction worth thousands of dollars. By the time I was ten, I had started breaking into houses and shops to steal. I became fascinated with fire and committed many acts of arson. At school, the teacher described me as uncontrollable.
When I was 12, I discovered a book about the occult and made my own Ouija board. Because my parents didn't believe in God, they thought that my interest in spiritism was just harmless fun and that it would keep me out of trouble. But by the time I left school, I had appeared many times before the juvenile court. I had joined a violent group called skinheads. I carried a razor and a bike chain as weapons. I found a job but soon lost it because I was sentenced to prison for a brief time. After my release, I again began vandalizing property and was arrested and sentenced to two years in prison. The judge described me as beyond reform and a menace to society.
After being released from prison, I met up with my former girlfriend, Anita. We married, and for a while I didn't steal or cause trouble. After a few years, though,I returned to a life of crime. I began breaking into businesses and robbing their safes. I started taking drugs, drinking heavily and carrying a gun. I was again arrested and sentenced to prison.
My lifestyle placed Anita under a great deal of stress. Her doctor gave her a prescription for tranquilizers but told her that what she really needed was a divorce. Fortunately for me, she didn't take his advice.
Next time: HOW THE BIBLE CHANGED MY LIFE
Watchtower, 2011
YEAR BORN: 1954
COUNTRY OF ORIGIN: ENGLAND
HISTORY: VIOLENT CRIMINAL
MY PAST: I was born in Dudley, a large industrial town in the West Midlands. From my childhood, Father instilled in me a love of reading. He also encouraged an appreciation for the marvels of nature, although he attributed those to evolution. He taught me that God did not exist. Even so, my parents sent me to a local Methodist Sunday school.
When I was eight, I saw some local boys set fire to a boat on the canal. The police came, but fear stopped me from talking to them. The boys had threatened me. I was unjustly accused of the crime and became resentful in response, I vandalized some local schools, churches and factories, leaving a trail of destruction worth thousands of dollars. By the time I was ten, I had started breaking into houses and shops to steal. I became fascinated with fire and committed many acts of arson. At school, the teacher described me as uncontrollable.
When I was 12, I discovered a book about the occult and made my own Ouija board. Because my parents didn't believe in God, they thought that my interest in spiritism was just harmless fun and that it would keep me out of trouble. But by the time I left school, I had appeared many times before the juvenile court. I had joined a violent group called skinheads. I carried a razor and a bike chain as weapons. I found a job but soon lost it because I was sentenced to prison for a brief time. After my release, I again began vandalizing property and was arrested and sentenced to two years in prison. The judge described me as beyond reform and a menace to society.
After being released from prison, I met up with my former girlfriend, Anita. We married, and for a while I didn't steal or cause trouble. After a few years, though,I returned to a life of crime. I began breaking into businesses and robbing their safes. I started taking drugs, drinking heavily and carrying a gun. I was again arrested and sentenced to prison.
My lifestyle placed Anita under a great deal of stress. Her doctor gave her a prescription for tranquilizers but told her that what she really needed was a divorce. Fortunately for me, she didn't take his advice.
Next time: HOW THE BIBLE CHANGED MY LIFE
Watchtower, 2011
THE BIBLE CHANGES LIVES
HOW THE BIBLE CHANGED MY LIFE
I knew that if I wanted to develop good qualities, I would have to work at it. But I didn't know where to start. I decided to go to an evangelical church in Madrid that I had once visited with my parents. I prayed to God, using his name, Jehovah.
Soon thereafter, two of Jehovah's Witnesses called at my home. I eagerly discussed the Bible with them, but I also raised many objections to what they were teaching. Esther, the Witness who conducted a regular Bible study with me, was very patient. She and her family showed me a great deal of love and tenderness. I began attending the meetings conducted by the Witnesses and soon realized that I had found the truth I had been looking for. (Same here with me)
I had just finished my dramatic arts studies when all sorts of career opportunities opened up. I secured a role in a production that would be staged in a famous theater in Madrid. But I also realized that to succeed as an actress, I would have to commit myself totally to the arts. I finally decided to try to find another form of employment, one that would allow me to focus on serving God. I took to heart Jesus' words: "No one can slave for two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will stick to the one and despise the other. You cannot slave for God and for Riches." (Matthew 6:24) My boyfriend of eight years did not share my convictions, so I decided to end the relationship. None of these changes were easy.
HOW I HAVE BENEFITED: At present, I work part-time, providing leisure activities and entertainment for the elderly. Doing so allows me to spend the majority of my time teaching the Bible to Arabic-speaking people who live in my area. I have to work hard at learning this new language, but I thoroughly enjoy sharing the good things that I have learned with people who are so hospitable and spiritually inclined.
The emptiness that I felt while I was studying to become an actress has now been replaced with a sense of purpose. I feel that Jehovah has helped me to become a better, happier person.
Next time: " I Have proved the judge wrong"
Watchtower, 2011
I knew that if I wanted to develop good qualities, I would have to work at it. But I didn't know where to start. I decided to go to an evangelical church in Madrid that I had once visited with my parents. I prayed to God, using his name, Jehovah.
Soon thereafter, two of Jehovah's Witnesses called at my home. I eagerly discussed the Bible with them, but I also raised many objections to what they were teaching. Esther, the Witness who conducted a regular Bible study with me, was very patient. She and her family showed me a great deal of love and tenderness. I began attending the meetings conducted by the Witnesses and soon realized that I had found the truth I had been looking for. (Same here with me)
I had just finished my dramatic arts studies when all sorts of career opportunities opened up. I secured a role in a production that would be staged in a famous theater in Madrid. But I also realized that to succeed as an actress, I would have to commit myself totally to the arts. I finally decided to try to find another form of employment, one that would allow me to focus on serving God. I took to heart Jesus' words: "No one can slave for two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will stick to the one and despise the other. You cannot slave for God and for Riches." (Matthew 6:24) My boyfriend of eight years did not share my convictions, so I decided to end the relationship. None of these changes were easy.
HOW I HAVE BENEFITED: At present, I work part-time, providing leisure activities and entertainment for the elderly. Doing so allows me to spend the majority of my time teaching the Bible to Arabic-speaking people who live in my area. I have to work hard at learning this new language, but I thoroughly enjoy sharing the good things that I have learned with people who are so hospitable and spiritually inclined.
The emptiness that I felt while I was studying to become an actress has now been replaced with a sense of purpose. I feel that Jehovah has helped me to become a better, happier person.
Next time: " I Have proved the judge wrong"
Watchtower, 2011
6.05.2011
THE BIBLE CHANGES LIVES
WHY did a popular singer give up her career to become a full-time minister of religion? And what enabled a criminal described by a judge as being beyond reform to become a productive member of society? Read these accounts to find the answers.
"No one can slave for two masters."
Year born: 1962
Country of origin: Spain
History: Actress and Zarzuela Singer
MY PAST: I was born in the small village of Tresjuncos, in the region known as La Mancha. My family worked the land. My mother was Catholic, and my father, Protestant. He taught me to respect the Bible; I saw him reading it all the time. But my mother raised me as a Catholic and took me to Mass every Sunday.
When I was 15, I left the village and went to live in Madrid with my older sister. I missed my parents a lot but eventually adapted to city life. When I was 17, I had the chance to work for a few months with a zarzuela, a traditional Spanish light opera. I enjoyed that life very much and decided to become an actress. I quit the sectretarial course I was taking and began working with different zarzuela companies. About this time, I began a relationship with the brother of one of my friends. I felt so fortunate to have a good job, money and love.
I began touring with different zarzuela companies throughout Spain as well as other countries, such as Colombia, Costa Rica, Ecuador, and Venezuela. I also sang with various groups that belonged to a popular musical movement in Madrid know as "La movida madrilena." One of the groups for which I was the main vocalist became successful.
I liked the work but not the immoral atmosphere. Moreover, I became obsessed with my appearance and with maintaining my image. I kept to a very strict diet and began suffering from anorexia and bulimia.
My main goal still was to become an actress. Eventually, I was accepted at the Madrid School of Dramatic Arts. We were taught that acting requires that the individual dig into the character's feelings and also into his or he own feelings. When I applied this advice, I realized that I was emotionally empty. I had become a superficial, selfish woman.
Next time: HOW THE BIBLE CHANGED MY LIFE
Watchtower, 2011
"No one can slave for two masters."
Year born: 1962
Country of origin: Spain
History: Actress and Zarzuela Singer
MY PAST: I was born in the small village of Tresjuncos, in the region known as La Mancha. My family worked the land. My mother was Catholic, and my father, Protestant. He taught me to respect the Bible; I saw him reading it all the time. But my mother raised me as a Catholic and took me to Mass every Sunday.
When I was 15, I left the village and went to live in Madrid with my older sister. I missed my parents a lot but eventually adapted to city life. When I was 17, I had the chance to work for a few months with a zarzuela, a traditional Spanish light opera. I enjoyed that life very much and decided to become an actress. I quit the sectretarial course I was taking and began working with different zarzuela companies. About this time, I began a relationship with the brother of one of my friends. I felt so fortunate to have a good job, money and love.
I began touring with different zarzuela companies throughout Spain as well as other countries, such as Colombia, Costa Rica, Ecuador, and Venezuela. I also sang with various groups that belonged to a popular musical movement in Madrid know as "La movida madrilena." One of the groups for which I was the main vocalist became successful.
I liked the work but not the immoral atmosphere. Moreover, I became obsessed with my appearance and with maintaining my image. I kept to a very strict diet and began suffering from anorexia and bulimia.
My main goal still was to become an actress. Eventually, I was accepted at the Madrid School of Dramatic Arts. We were taught that acting requires that the individual dig into the character's feelings and also into his or he own feelings. When I applied this advice, I realized that I was emotionally empty. I had become a superficial, selfish woman.
Next time: HOW THE BIBLE CHANGED MY LIFE
Watchtower, 2011
Will Everlasting Life in Paradise be Boring?
The Bible offers the hope that we can live forever in Paradise on earth. (Psalm 37:29; Luke 23:43) Will living endlessly in a perfect environment become boring?
That is a worthwhile question. Researchers have found that chronic boredom may cause a person to become anxious, depressed and prone to taking risks. Those who see no purpose in life or who tire of their daily routine might succumb to boredom. Will the lives of those in Paradise lack purpose? Will the daily routine be dull?
First, consider that it is Jehovah God, the Author of the Bible, who makes the offer of everlasting life. (John 3:6; 2 Timothy 3:16) God's primary quality is love. (1 John 4:8) Jehovah loves us deeply and has given us all the good things that we now enjoy. - James 1:17.
Our Creator knows that in order to be happy, we need purposeful work. (Psalm 139:14-16; Ecclesiastes 3:12) In Paradise, workers will not feel like insignificant cogs in some massive machine. The work they will do will directly benefit them and those they love. (Isaiah 65:22-24) If you had interesting, challenging, full-time work to do, would you find life boring?
Consider, too, that Jehovah God will not allow just anyone to live in Paradise. He offers the gift of everlasting life only to those who imitate his Son, Jesus. ( John 17:3) While on earth, Jesus delighted to do his Father's will. He taught his follower both by word and by example that lasting happiness comes more from giving than from receiving. (Acts 20:35) In the restored Paradise, all will live by the two greatest commandment-those that call for love of God and love of neighbor. (Matthew 22:36-40) Imagine being surrounded by unselfish people who love you and who love their work! Do you think you would become bored in such company?
What else will live in Paradise involve? Each day, we will be able to learn something new about our Creator. Researchers have already made many remarkable discoveries about Jehovah's creative works. (Romans 1:20) So far, though, we have hardly scratched the surface. Thousands of years ago, the faithful man Job reviewed what he knew about God's creative works, and his conclusion is still true. "These are the fringes of [God's]ways," Job said, "and what a whisper of a matter has been heard of him! Buy of his mighty thunder who can show understanding?" -Job 26:14.
No matter how long we live, we will never discover all there is to know about Jehovah God and his works. The Bible states that God has put the desire to live forever in our hearts. But it also says that we will "never find out the work that the true God has made from the start to the finish." (Ecclesiastes 3:10, 11) Do you think you will ever get bored with learning new things about your Creator?
Even now, those who are busy doing work that benefits others and brings glory to God seldom find that they are bored. We can be sure that if we remain busy doing similar work, we will never become bored-even if we live forever.
Next time: THE BIBLE CHANGES LIVES
Watchtower, 2011
That is a worthwhile question. Researchers have found that chronic boredom may cause a person to become anxious, depressed and prone to taking risks. Those who see no purpose in life or who tire of their daily routine might succumb to boredom. Will the lives of those in Paradise lack purpose? Will the daily routine be dull?
First, consider that it is Jehovah God, the Author of the Bible, who makes the offer of everlasting life. (John 3:6; 2 Timothy 3:16) God's primary quality is love. (1 John 4:8) Jehovah loves us deeply and has given us all the good things that we now enjoy. - James 1:17.
Our Creator knows that in order to be happy, we need purposeful work. (Psalm 139:14-16; Ecclesiastes 3:12) In Paradise, workers will not feel like insignificant cogs in some massive machine. The work they will do will directly benefit them and those they love. (Isaiah 65:22-24) If you had interesting, challenging, full-time work to do, would you find life boring?
Consider, too, that Jehovah God will not allow just anyone to live in Paradise. He offers the gift of everlasting life only to those who imitate his Son, Jesus. ( John 17:3) While on earth, Jesus delighted to do his Father's will. He taught his follower both by word and by example that lasting happiness comes more from giving than from receiving. (Acts 20:35) In the restored Paradise, all will live by the two greatest commandment-those that call for love of God and love of neighbor. (Matthew 22:36-40) Imagine being surrounded by unselfish people who love you and who love their work! Do you think you would become bored in such company?
What else will live in Paradise involve? Each day, we will be able to learn something new about our Creator. Researchers have already made many remarkable discoveries about Jehovah's creative works. (Romans 1:20) So far, though, we have hardly scratched the surface. Thousands of years ago, the faithful man Job reviewed what he knew about God's creative works, and his conclusion is still true. "These are the fringes of [God's]ways," Job said, "and what a whisper of a matter has been heard of him! Buy of his mighty thunder who can show understanding?" -Job 26:14.
No matter how long we live, we will never discover all there is to know about Jehovah God and his works. The Bible states that God has put the desire to live forever in our hearts. But it also says that we will "never find out the work that the true God has made from the start to the finish." (Ecclesiastes 3:10, 11) Do you think you will ever get bored with learning new things about your Creator?
Even now, those who are busy doing work that benefits others and brings glory to God seldom find that they are bored. We can be sure that if we remain busy doing similar work, we will never become bored-even if we live forever.
Next time: THE BIBLE CHANGES LIVES
Watchtower, 2011
6.04.2011
KEYS TO FAMILY HAPPINESS
A Child Can Change a Marriage for Good
Just a pair of inexperienced skaters need time and patience to find their balance on the ice, you need time to adjust to your new roles as parents. Eventually, though, you will gain confidence.
Childrearing will test your commitment to your marriage and forever change your relationship with each other. However, it will also give you the opportunity to develop valuable qualities. If you apply the Bible's wise advice, your experience will be like that of a father named Kenneth. He says: "Raising children has had a good effect on my wife and me. We are now less self-centered, and we have become more loving and understanding." Those sorts of changes are certainly welcome in a marriage.
Next time: Will Everlasting Life in Paradise be Boring?
Watchtower, 2011
Just a pair of inexperienced skaters need time and patience to find their balance on the ice, you need time to adjust to your new roles as parents. Eventually, though, you will gain confidence.
Childrearing will test your commitment to your marriage and forever change your relationship with each other. However, it will also give you the opportunity to develop valuable qualities. If you apply the Bible's wise advice, your experience will be like that of a father named Kenneth. He says: "Raising children has had a good effect on my wife and me. We are now less self-centered, and we have become more loving and understanding." Those sorts of changes are certainly welcome in a marriage.
Next time: Will Everlasting Life in Paradise be Boring?
Watchtower, 2011
6.03.2011
KEYS TO FAMILY HAPPINESS
CHALLENGE 3: You disagree about parenting.
A couple could find that their backgrounds cause them to argue. A Japanese mother named Asami and her husband, Katsuro, faced this challenge. Asami says: "I felt that Katsuro was being too easy on our daughter, while he felt that I was being too hard on her." How can you avoid working against each other?
*A key to success: Communicate with your mate, and support each other. Wise King Solomon wrote: 'By presumptuousness one only causes a struggle, but with those consulting together there is wisdom." (Proverbs 13:10) how much do you know about your mate's approach to raising children? If you wait until your baby is born before discussing specific child-training issues, you may find that you end up struggling with each other instead of dealing with the challenge successfully.
For example, what answers to the following questions have you agreed on: "How can we teach our child good eating and sleeping habits? Should we always pick up the baby if it cries at bedtime? How should we react to potty-training setbacks?" Obviously, the decisions you make will be different from those of other couples. Ethan, the father of two, says: "You need to talk things over in order to be on the same wavelength. Then, together, you will be able to respond to your child's needs."
TRY THIS: Think about the parenting techniques that your own parents used when raising you. Decide which of their attitudes and actions you would like to imitate when raising your child. Also, decide which, if any attitudes and actions you you want to avoid repeating,. Discuss your conclusions with your mate.
Next time: A Child Can Change a Marriage for Good
Watchtower, 2011
A couple could find that their backgrounds cause them to argue. A Japanese mother named Asami and her husband, Katsuro, faced this challenge. Asami says: "I felt that Katsuro was being too easy on our daughter, while he felt that I was being too hard on her." How can you avoid working against each other?
*A key to success: Communicate with your mate, and support each other. Wise King Solomon wrote: 'By presumptuousness one only causes a struggle, but with those consulting together there is wisdom." (Proverbs 13:10) how much do you know about your mate's approach to raising children? If you wait until your baby is born before discussing specific child-training issues, you may find that you end up struggling with each other instead of dealing with the challenge successfully.
For example, what answers to the following questions have you agreed on: "How can we teach our child good eating and sleeping habits? Should we always pick up the baby if it cries at bedtime? How should we react to potty-training setbacks?" Obviously, the decisions you make will be different from those of other couples. Ethan, the father of two, says: "You need to talk things over in order to be on the same wavelength. Then, together, you will be able to respond to your child's needs."
TRY THIS: Think about the parenting techniques that your own parents used when raising you. Decide which of their attitudes and actions you would like to imitate when raising your child. Also, decide which, if any attitudes and actions you you want to avoid repeating,. Discuss your conclusions with your mate.
Next time: A Child Can Change a Marriage for Good
Watchtower, 2011
KEYS TO FAMILY HAPPINESS
Conclusion of CHALLENGE 2: Your relationship as a couple weakens.
If you are a husband, what can you do to strengthen the marriage? Tell your wife that you love her. Back up your words with acts of tenderness. Make a conscious effort to allay any feelings of insecurity that your wife may have. Sarah, a 30-year-old mother, says: "A wife needs to know that she is still valued and loved, even though her body is not what it was before her pregnancy." Alan, who lives in Germany and is the father of two boys, sees the need for providing emotional support. He says: "I have always tried to be a shoulder for my wife to cry on."
Understandably, the arrival of a baby disrupts a couple's sexual relationship. So a husband and wife need to discuss each other's needs. The Bible states that changes in a couple's sexual relationship should be made by "mutual consent." ( 1 Corinthians 7:1-5) That requires communication. Depending on your upbringing or cultural background, you might be reluctant to talk about sexual matters with your spouse. But such conversations are vital as a couple adjust to the routines of parenthood. Be empathetic, patient and honest. ( 1 Corinthians 10:24) You and your spouse will thus avoid misunderstandings and will deepen your love for each other. -1 Peter 3:7, 8.
A couple can also deepen the love they feel for each other by expressing appreciation. A wise husband will realize that much of the work performed by a new mother goes unseen. Vivianne says: "By the end of the day, I often feel as if I have accomplished nothing-even though I have been busy caring for the baby constantly!" Despite being busy, a discerning wife will be careful not to belittle her husband's contribution to the family. -Proverbs 17:17.
TRY THIS: Mothers, if possible, take a nap when your baby is sleeping. By thus "recharging your batteries," you will have more energy for your marriage. Fathers, whenever possible, get up at night to feed or change the baby so that your wife can rest. Regularly reaffirm you love for your mate by leaving notes for her, sending her text messages, or talking to her on the telephone. As a couple, make time to have one-on-one conversations. Talk about each other, not only about your child. Keep your friendship with your spouse strong, and you will be better able to handle the challenges of parenthood.
Next time: CHALLENGE 3: You disagree about parenting.
Watchtower, 2011
If you are a husband, what can you do to strengthen the marriage? Tell your wife that you love her. Back up your words with acts of tenderness. Make a conscious effort to allay any feelings of insecurity that your wife may have. Sarah, a 30-year-old mother, says: "A wife needs to know that she is still valued and loved, even though her body is not what it was before her pregnancy." Alan, who lives in Germany and is the father of two boys, sees the need for providing emotional support. He says: "I have always tried to be a shoulder for my wife to cry on."
Understandably, the arrival of a baby disrupts a couple's sexual relationship. So a husband and wife need to discuss each other's needs. The Bible states that changes in a couple's sexual relationship should be made by "mutual consent." ( 1 Corinthians 7:1-5) That requires communication. Depending on your upbringing or cultural background, you might be reluctant to talk about sexual matters with your spouse. But such conversations are vital as a couple adjust to the routines of parenthood. Be empathetic, patient and honest. ( 1 Corinthians 10:24) You and your spouse will thus avoid misunderstandings and will deepen your love for each other. -1 Peter 3:7, 8.
A couple can also deepen the love they feel for each other by expressing appreciation. A wise husband will realize that much of the work performed by a new mother goes unseen. Vivianne says: "By the end of the day, I often feel as if I have accomplished nothing-even though I have been busy caring for the baby constantly!" Despite being busy, a discerning wife will be careful not to belittle her husband's contribution to the family. -Proverbs 17:17.
TRY THIS: Mothers, if possible, take a nap when your baby is sleeping. By thus "recharging your batteries," you will have more energy for your marriage. Fathers, whenever possible, get up at night to feed or change the baby so that your wife can rest. Regularly reaffirm you love for your mate by leaving notes for her, sending her text messages, or talking to her on the telephone. As a couple, make time to have one-on-one conversations. Talk about each other, not only about your child. Keep your friendship with your spouse strong, and you will be better able to handle the challenges of parenthood.
Next time: CHALLENGE 3: You disagree about parenting.
Watchtower, 2011
6.02.2011
KEYS TO FAMILY HAPPINESS- How Children Change a Marriage
CHALLENGE 2: Your relationship as a couple weakens.
Exhausted by fragmented sleep and unexpected crises, many new parents struggle to remain close. Vivianne, a French mother of two infants, admits: "At first, I was so focused on my duty as a mother that I almost forgot my role as a wife."
On the other hand, a husband may fail to recognize that pregnancy has taken a toil on his wife-both physically and emotionally. A new baby can consume time and energy that both of you formerly used to remain emotionally and sexually intimate. How, then, can a couple ensure that their helpless, lovable baby does not become a wedge that drives them apart?
*A key to success: Reaffirm your love for each other. Describing marriage, the Bible states: "A man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become as one flesh." (Genesis 2:24) Jehovah God intended that children eventually leave their parents. By contrast, God expects the one flesh bond between a husband and his wife to last a lifetime. (Matthew19:3-9) How can appreciating that fact help a couple with a new baby to maintain proper priorities?
Vivianne, quoted earlier, says: "I thought about the words at Genesis 2:24, and that verse helped me realize that I had become 'one flesh' with my husband-not with my child. I saw the need to strengthen our marriage." Theresa, the mother of a two-year-old girl, says: "If I start to feel distant from my husband, I make immediate efforts to give him my full attention, even if only for a little while each day.
Next time: Conclusion of CHALLENGE 2: Your relationship as a couple weakens
Watchtower, 2011
Exhausted by fragmented sleep and unexpected crises, many new parents struggle to remain close. Vivianne, a French mother of two infants, admits: "At first, I was so focused on my duty as a mother that I almost forgot my role as a wife."
On the other hand, a husband may fail to recognize that pregnancy has taken a toil on his wife-both physically and emotionally. A new baby can consume time and energy that both of you formerly used to remain emotionally and sexually intimate. How, then, can a couple ensure that their helpless, lovable baby does not become a wedge that drives them apart?
*A key to success: Reaffirm your love for each other. Describing marriage, the Bible states: "A man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become as one flesh." (Genesis 2:24) Jehovah God intended that children eventually leave their parents. By contrast, God expects the one flesh bond between a husband and his wife to last a lifetime. (Matthew19:3-9) How can appreciating that fact help a couple with a new baby to maintain proper priorities?
Vivianne, quoted earlier, says: "I thought about the words at Genesis 2:24, and that verse helped me realize that I had become 'one flesh' with my husband-not with my child. I saw the need to strengthen our marriage." Theresa, the mother of a two-year-old girl, says: "If I start to feel distant from my husband, I make immediate efforts to give him my full attention, even if only for a little while each day.
Next time: Conclusion of CHALLENGE 2: Your relationship as a couple weakens
Watchtower, 2011
KEYS TO FAMILY HAPPINESS- How Children Change a Marriage
CHALLENGE 1: Life suddenly revolves around the child.
A new baby consumes its mother's time and thoughts. She may feel a deep sense of emotional fulfillment in caring for her baby. Meanwhile, her husband might feel neglected. Manuel, who lives in Brazil, says: "My wife's shift of focus from me to our baby was the most difficult change for me to accept. Before, it was just the two of us, and then all of a sudden, it was just my wife and the baby." How can you cope with the upheaval?
*A key to success: Be patient. "Love is long-suffering and kind." says the Bible. Love "does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked." (1 Corinthians 13:4, 5) When a new baby arrives, what can both husband and wife do to apply that counsel?
A wise husband proves to his love for his wife by educating himself about the physical and mental impact childbirth has on a woman. If he does so, he will realize why his wife may be prone to sudden mood changes. Adam, who lives in France and is the father of an 11-month-old girl, admits: "My wife's mood changes are sometimes difficult to deal with. But I try to remember that her frustration is not really directed at me personally. Rather, it is a response to the unfamiliar stresses of our new situation.
Does your wife sometimes misunderstand your attempts to help out? If so, do not quickly become offended. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) Instead, patiently look for her best interests, not your own, and you will avoid getting upset. -Proverbs 14:29.
On the other hand, a discerning wife will try to encourage her husband in his new role. She will involve him in child care, patiently showing him how to change diapers or prepare feeding bottles-even though he may seem clumsy at first.
Ellen, a 26-year-old mother, recognized that she needed to make some adjustments in the way she treated her husband. "I had to become less possessive of the baby," she says. "And I had to remind myself not to be too picky when my husband tried to apply my suggestions about caring for the infant."
TRY THIS: Wives, if your husband performs some child-care in a different way than you do, resist the urge to criticize him or to redo the job. Commend him for what he does adequately, and you will build his confidence and encourage him to give you the support you need. Husbands, cut back on nonessential activities so that you will have as much time as possible to help your wife, especially during the first few months after the baby is born.
Next time: CHALLENGE 2: Your relationship as a couple weakens.
Watchtower, 2011
A new baby consumes its mother's time and thoughts. She may feel a deep sense of emotional fulfillment in caring for her baby. Meanwhile, her husband might feel neglected. Manuel, who lives in Brazil, says: "My wife's shift of focus from me to our baby was the most difficult change for me to accept. Before, it was just the two of us, and then all of a sudden, it was just my wife and the baby." How can you cope with the upheaval?
*A key to success: Be patient. "Love is long-suffering and kind." says the Bible. Love "does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked." (1 Corinthians 13:4, 5) When a new baby arrives, what can both husband and wife do to apply that counsel?
A wise husband proves to his love for his wife by educating himself about the physical and mental impact childbirth has on a woman. If he does so, he will realize why his wife may be prone to sudden mood changes. Adam, who lives in France and is the father of an 11-month-old girl, admits: "My wife's mood changes are sometimes difficult to deal with. But I try to remember that her frustration is not really directed at me personally. Rather, it is a response to the unfamiliar stresses of our new situation.
Does your wife sometimes misunderstand your attempts to help out? If so, do not quickly become offended. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) Instead, patiently look for her best interests, not your own, and you will avoid getting upset. -Proverbs 14:29.
On the other hand, a discerning wife will try to encourage her husband in his new role. She will involve him in child care, patiently showing him how to change diapers or prepare feeding bottles-even though he may seem clumsy at first.
Ellen, a 26-year-old mother, recognized that she needed to make some adjustments in the way she treated her husband. "I had to become less possessive of the baby," she says. "And I had to remind myself not to be too picky when my husband tried to apply my suggestions about caring for the infant."
TRY THIS: Wives, if your husband performs some child-care in a different way than you do, resist the urge to criticize him or to redo the job. Commend him for what he does adequately, and you will build his confidence and encourage him to give you the support you need. Husbands, cut back on nonessential activities so that you will have as much time as possible to help your wife, especially during the first few months after the baby is born.
Next time: CHALLENGE 2: Your relationship as a couple weakens.
Watchtower, 2011
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