BUILDING A FAMILY THAT HONORS GOD

TOOLS FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE

No matter how well-matched a married couple seem to be, they differ in emotional makeup, childhood experiences, and family background.  Therefore,  some problems are be expected after marriage. How will they  be handled?  Well, when builders construct a house, the consult the plans. These are guidelines to be followed.  The Bible provides God's standards for building a happy marriage. Let us examine a few of these.

Loyalty, Jesus said:  "What God has yoked together let no man put apart."  (Matthew 19:6)  The apostle Paul wrote:  "Let marriage  be honorable among all, and the marriage be without defilement, for God will judge fornicators and adulterers."  (Hebrews 13:4)  Married persons should therefore feel an obligation toward Jehovah to remain faithful to their mates. -Genesis 39:7-9.  

Loyalty accords the marriage dignity and security. Loyal spouses know that, come what may, they will support each other.  (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)  How different from those who abandon their marriage at the first hint of trouble!  Such individuals quickly conclude that they "chose the wrong person,'  that they have 'fallen out of love,' that a new mate  is the cure. But this gives neither spouse opportunity to grow. Instead, such disloyal ones may carry the same problems to new partners. When a person  has a fine home but finds that the roof is leaking, surely he tries to repair it. He does not just move to another house. Similarly, changing a mate is not the way to solve the issues that lie beneath marital strife.  When problems arise, do not try to get out of the marriage, but work very hard to preserve it. Such loyalty treats the union as something worth guarding, maintaining, and cherishing. 

Communication,  "There is a frustrating of plans where there is no confidential talk," says a Bible proverb.  (Proverbs 15:22) Yet, communicating is difficult for some married couples.  Why is that the case?  Because people have different communication styles.  This is a fact that often leads to considerable misunderstanding and frustration. Upbringing may play a role in this. For example, some may have been raised in an atmosphere of parental bickering. Now as married adults, they may not know how to speak to their mate in a kind and loving way. Nevertheless, you home need not deteriorate into 'a house full of quarreling.' (Proverbs 17:1) The Bible stresses putting on "the new personality," and it does not condone malicious bitterness, screaming, and abusive speech. -Ephesians 4:22-24, 31.  

Next time: BUILDING A FAMILY THAT HONORS GOD/ Continue with TOOLS FOR BUILDING A HAPPY MARRIAGE

From the book: KNOWLEDGE That Leads to Everlasting Life