YOUNG PEOPLE ASK/Friendship or Romance? - Part 1: What Signals Am I Receiving? Conclusion

What you can do

* Be objective. Take a step back and analyze the relationship. Ask yourself, 'Do I have solid reasons for thinking that this person is treating me differently from others?  Don't let your emotions hijack your "power of reason." ROMANS 12:1. 

* Be discerning, Out of all those signs that make you think you might be more than friends,  pay special attention to the signs that make you second-guess yourself.  Don't assume  that just because you feel a certain way about someone, the feeling is mutual. 

* Be patient.  Until the person says explicitly that he or she wants to get to know you in a romantic way, don't invest more in the relationship than you can afford to lose. 

* Be honest.  The Bible says that there is "a time to speak." (Ecclesiastes 3:7)  If you want to find out whether someone views you as more than just a friend, talk it out with the person.  "If the feelings aren't mutual," says a young woman named Valerie,  "it's better to be a little hurt now than to do on for months before realizing that this person wasn't interested in the first place." 

The bottom line: "Safeguard your heart," says Proverbs 4:23)  If you feel drawn   to someone, find out if that person is drawn to you. Allowing romantic feelings to take root before then is like trying to grow a plant on solid stone. 

If you discover that the person does have feelings for you --and if you're old enough and ready to date- then it's up to you to decide if you want to pursue the relationship. Remember, a strong marriage is made up of a husband and a wife who share the same spiritual goals and who are also up-front and honest with each other.  (1 Corinthians 7:39) In fact, they no doubt started out as - and continue to be -good friends. 

Next time: Build Strong Friendships Before the End Comes

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