Young People Ask . . ./How Do I Deal With Angry People?

"He was raging mad, I guess because he saw that I was little, he wanted to beat me up. As I was backing away, I said:  'Hold on for a second! Wait a minute! Why do you want to beat me up? I haven't done anything to you. I don't even know what you are made about. Can we talk about it' " -16-year-old David.


HAVE you ever been the target of a bully's rage? The Bible predicted that people today would be "fierce, without love of goodness."  (2 Timothy 3:3)  And while you may have done all you can to avoid "companionship; with anyone given to anger . .  . , having fits of rage," there may be times when you simply cannot escape angry people.  (Proverbs 22:24) How should you respond when you find yourself in such a situation? 

Responding to Rage

Today many youths might respond by displaying rage of their own. But doing so simply causes more pain. Furthermore, losing your own control would bring you down to the level of the one raging. Proverbs 26:24 says:  Do not answer anyone stupid according to his foolishness, that you yourself also may not become equal to him." Young Jeremy learned the truth of these words the hard way. He recalls sitting a the lunch table in school:  "There was a group of boys that would always make fun of one another and other people.  Very often they would talk about me. I generally ignored their talk. However, when one of the them started  talking about my mother, I lost control and flew at him in a fit of anger."  The result?  "He beat me up good," says Jeremy.

The Bible gives this wise advice: "An answer, when mild, turns away rage, but  a word causing pain makes anger come up." (Proverbs 15:1) Yes, responding to anger with "a word causing pain" only aggravates the situation. However, a mild reply can often calm things down a tense situation.

Recall David, mentioned at the outset. He was able to talk the bully into explaining why he was angry. It turned out that someone had stolen the bully's lunch, and was simply taking out his frustration on the first person who came his way. "Beating me up is not going to replace your lunch," David reasoned. He then suggested that they both go over to the cafeteria. "Since I knew the  clerk there,"  recalls David, "I was able to replace his lunch.  He shook my hand, and he was friendly to me after that." Do you see how powerful mild words can be?  As a proverb put it, "a mild tongue itself can break a bone." -Proverbs 25:15. 

Next time: Young People Ask . . ./Mildness-Weakness or Strength?

From the Awake! magazine