Why Be Reasonable in Our Expectations?

HOPES  realized and aspirations attained  give us a sense of satisfaction. Admittedly, though, many of our dreams and expectations do not turn out the way we wish.  Recurring disappointments in life can make us feel exasperated with ourselves and even with others.  A wise man aptly observed:  "Expectation postponed is making the heart sick." -Proverbs 13:12. 

What are some factors that can lead to feelings of disappointment?  How can we work at being reasonable in our expectations? Furthermore, why is it to our benefit to do so?  

Expectations and Disappointments

With the fast pace of life today, the more we try to keep up, the further we seem to fall behind. Demands on our time and energy can be unrelenting, and when we fail to get done what we set out to do, there is a tendency to come down on ourselves. We could even begin to feel as though we are letting others down. Cynthia, a wife and mother who knows the pressures of parenting, says: "Being inconsistent in correcting my children and feeling that I am not adequately training them is exasperating."  Stephanie, a teenager, says regarding her education:  "I don' have enough time to do everything I want to do, and that triggers feelings of impatience in me.

Unreasonably high expectations easily turn into perfectionism, and this can be most frustrating.  Ben, a young married man, confesses.  "When i examine my actions, thoughts, or feelings, I always see how they could have  been better. I am constantly looking for perfection, and this leads to impatience, frustration, and disappointment." Gail, a Christian wife, says: "Perfectionist thinking does not allow for failure. We want  to be supermoms and super wives. We have to  be productive to be happy, so wasted effort irritates us." 

The  forgoing is  sampling of what can trigger feelings of disappointment. Left unchecked, such feelings can even lead us to believe  that we are  not appreciated by others. So, what positive measures can we take to cope with disappointments and to cultivate reasonable expectations?  

Next time: Ways to Cultivate Reasonable Expectations

From the Watchtower magazine, 2000