Prevention in the Home - An Emotionally Safe Place

 

One young woman whom we'll call Sandi says:  "My whole family was set up for abuse. It as isolated, and each member was isolated from the other."  Isolation, rigidity, and obsessive secrecy-these unhealthy, unscriptural attitudes ae trademarks of the abusive household.  (Compare  2 Samuel 12:12; Proverbs 1:1; Philippians 4:5) Create a home atmosphere that is emotionally safe for children. Home should be a place where they feel built up, where they feel free to open their hearts and speak freely. And it should feel safe.

Also, children have a great need for physical expression of love-hugging, caressing, handholding, romping. Do not overreact to the dangers of sexual abuse by withholding these demonstrations of love.  Teach children to open, warm affection and praise that they are valued.  Sandi remembers: "My mom's view was that to give anyone commendation for anything was wrong. It would give give you a big head."  Sandi suffered at least ten years of sexual abuse in silence. Children who are not secure in the knowledge that they are beloved, worthwhile individuals may be more susceptible to an abuser's  praise, his "affection," or his treats to withdraw it.

A pedophile who sexually abused hundreds of boys over a 40-year period admitted that the boys who had an emotional need for a friend like him made the "best" victims. Don't create such a need in your child.

Next time: Prevention in the Home - Break the Cycle of Abuse

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