WIFELY SUBJECTION

Some time after Adam was created, "Jehovah God went on to say:  'It is not good for the man to continue by himself.  I am going to make a helper for him, as a  complement of him.' " (Genesis 2:18)  God created Eve as "a complement, not as a competitor.  Marriage was not to be like a ship with two competing captains.  The husband was to exercise loving headship, (be the boss) and the wife was to manifest love, respect, and willing submission.  

However, a good wife is more than just submissive.  She tries to be a real helper,  being supportive of her husband in the decisions he makes.  Of course, that is easier for her when she agrees with his decisions.  But even when she does not, her active support can help his decision to have a more successful outcome.  

A wife can help her husband to be a good head in other ways.  She can express appreciation for his efforts in taking the lead, instead of criticizing him or making him feel that he can never satisfy her. (Some women are never satisfied, no matter what the husband does and some men are the same way) In dealing with her husband in a positive way, she should remember that a "quiet and mild spirit . . .is of great value in the eyes of God," not just in the eyes of her husband.  (1 Peter 3:3, 4; Colossians 3:12) What if the husband is not a believer? Whether he is or not, the Scriptures encourage the wives "to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sound in mind, chaste, workers at home, good, subjecting themselves to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be spoken of abusively." (Titus 2:4, 5) If matters of conscience  come up, an unbelieving husband is more likely to respect his wife's position if it is presented with a "mild temper and deep respect."  Some unbelieving husbands have been "won without a word through the conduct of their wives, because of having been eyewitnesses of [their] chaste conduct together with deep respect." -1 Peter 3:1, 2, 15' 1 Corinthians 7:13-16. 

What if a husband asks his wife to do something forbidden by God?  If that happens, she must remember that God is her primary Ruler.  She takes as an example what the apostles did when they were asked by authorities to violate God's law. Acts 5:29 relates: "Peter and the other apostles said: "We must obey God as ruler rather than men.' "

Next time: GOOD COMMUNICATION

From the book: THE SECRET OF FAMILY HAPPINESS, 1996