Continue with How Can Father Stay Close to Their Sons?

3. LACK OF BALANCED ADVICE:  Some cultures downplay the father's role in raising children.  "Where I grew up," says Luca, who  was raised in a Western European land,  "people felt that looking after their children was  wife's job."  In other cultures, fathers are encouraged to be strict disciplinarians  but little else. George, for example, was brought up in an African country. He says:  "In my cultured, fathers do not play together with their children for fear that this will lessen the Father's authority. So i have always had trouble just enjoying the company of my son."

TO THINK ABOUT:  In your community, what role are fathers expected to play?  Are they taught to view child rearing as women's work?  Are fathers encouraged to express love and affection for their sons, or are such ideas frowned upon? 

If you are a father who faces one or more  of these challenges, how can you succeed?  Consider the following suggestions. 

Start While Your Son Is Young

Sons seem to be born with a desire to imitate their father. So while your son is young, harness that desire. How can you do so?And when can you find time to spend with him? 

Whenever possible, include your son in your daily activities.  For example, if you are doing chores, have him help; you. Give your boy a small broom or a tiny spade. No doubt he will be delighted to work by the side of his hero and role model, his dad! It may take you a little longer to finish the chore; but you will strengthen the bond between you , and you  will be teaching him a good worth ethic.  Long ago, the Bible encouraged fathers to include their children in their daily activities and to use those occasions to communicate with them and to teach them.  (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)  Such advice is still sound.

In addition to working  with your boy, make time to play together with him.  Play does much more than provide and opportunity to have fun together. Research shows that when fathers play with their young children, they encourage them  to be more adventurous and bold. 

Play between a father and son serves an even more  important function.  "It is through play," says researcher Michel Fize,  "that a boy communicates best with his father."  During playtime, a father can express affection for his son by both words and actions. In doing so, he teaches his son how to express affection too.   "When my son was child," says  Andre', a father who lives in Germany,  "we often played together. I hugged him, and he learned to return my love." 

Bedtime is another occasion when a father can strengthen  the bonds of love with his son. Regularly read him a story, and listen to him express his joys and concerns about the day. If you do, you will make it easier for him to continue communicating with you as he grows older. 

Next time: Continue to Pursue Common Interests

From the Watchtower magazine, 2011