CAREGIVERS NEED CARE TOO

Caring for an infirm parent is hard work, involving many tasks, much responsibility, and long hours.  But the most difficult part is often emotional. it is distressing to watch your parents  lost their health, memory, and independence.  Sandy, who comes from Puerto Rico, relates:  "My mother was the nucleus of our family.  It was very painful to care for her.  First  she started limping; then she needed a cane, then a walker, then a wheelchair. After that it was downhill until she passed away. She developed bone cancer and needed constant care-day and night. We bathed her and fed her and read to her. It was very difficult-especially emotionally.  When I realized that my mother was dying,m I cried because I loved her so much." 

If you find yourself in a similar situation, what can you do to cope?  Listening to Jehovah by Bible reading and speaking to him through prayer will help you greatly.  (Philippians 4:6, 7)  In a practical way, make sure that you eat balanced meals and try to get adequate sleep.  By doing this, you will be in a better condition, both emotionally and physically, to take care of your loved one.  Perhaps you can arrange an occasional break from the daily routine.  Even if a vacation is  not possible, It is still wise to schedule some time for relaxation.  In order to get time away, you may able to arrange for someone else to stay with your ailing parent.

It is not unusual for adult caregivers to have unreasonable expectations of themselves.  But do not feel guilty for what you cannot do.  In some circumstances you may need to entrust your loved one to the care of a nursing home. If you are a caregiver, set reasonable expectations for yourself. You must balance the needs not only of your parents but also of your children, your spouse, and yourself. 

Next time: STRENGTH BEYOND WHAT IS NORMAL

From the book: THE SECRET OF FAMILY HAPPINESS, 1996