HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT IT?

Disruption of the normal routine of life, no matter what the cause is always difficult.  And this is especially true if the disruption is caused by prolonged sickness. Even a short-term illness calls for adjustments, concessions, and sacrifices.  Healthy family members may have to keep quiet to allow the sick one to get rest.  They may have to forgo certain activities.  Still in most families even young children  feel compassion for a sick sibling or parent, although they may occasionally have to be reminded to be thoughtful.  (Colossians 3:12)  In the case of temporary sickness, the family is usually ready to do what is needed.  Besides, each family member would hope for similar consideration if he or she were to get sick. -Matthew 7:12. 

What though, if the illness is very serious and the disruptions are drastic and prolonged?  For example, what if someone in the family is paralyzed by a stroke, disabled by Alzheimer's disease, or debilitated by some  other illness? Or what if a member of the family is afflicted with a mental illness, such as schizophrenia? A common initial reaction is pity-sadness  that a loved one is suffering so much.  However, pity may be followed by other reactions. As family members find themselves very much afflicted  and their freedoms limited by the sickness of one person, they may come to feel resentment.  They may wonder:  "Why does this have to happen to me?" 

Something similar seems to have gone through the mind of Job's wife.  Remember, she had already experienced the loss of her children.  As those tragic events unfolded, she no doubt felt progressively more distraught.  Finally, as she saw her once active and vigorous husband afflicted with a painful, loathsome disease, she appears to have  lost sight of the vital factor that overshadowed all the tragedies-the relationship  that she and her husband had with God. The Bible says:  "Finally [Job's] wife said to him: 'Are you holding fast to your integrity?  Curse God and die!' " -Job 2:9.

Many feel frustrated, even angry, when their life is radically changed by someone else's sickness.  Still a Christian who reasons on the situation should realize eventually that this affords him an opportunity to demonstrate the genuineness of his love. True love "is long suffering and kind . . . [and] does not look for its own interests . . . It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)    (correction there. If you are getting physically beaten up by your spouse, that pretty much dims or may eliminate that love)  Rather than allow negative feelings to dominate, therefore, it is essential that we do our best to get them under control. -Proverbs 3:21.  (note: that is easy to say or do if you are not getting the hades beat out of you)

What can be done to safeguard the spiritual and emotional welfare of  a family when one of its members is seriously ill? Of course, each illness calls for its own particular care and treatment, and it would not be proper in this publication to recommend any medical or home-care  procedures.  Nonetheless, in a spiritual sense, Jehovah "is raising  up all who are bowed down." (Psalm 145:14)  King David wrote: "Happy is anyone acting with consideration toward the lowly one; in the day of calamity Jehovah will provide escape for him.  Jehovah himself will guard him and preserve him alive. . . .Jehovah himself will sustain him upon a divan of illness." (Psalm 41:1-3) Jehovah preserves his servants alive spiritually, even when they are tried emotionally beyond their own limits.  (2 Corinthians 4:7)  Many family members facing serious sickness in their household have echoed the words of the psalmist:  "I have been afflicted to great extent. O Jehovah, preserve me alive according to your word." -Psalm 119:107.  

Next time: A HEALING SPIRIT

From the book: THE SECRET OF FAMILY HAPPINESS, 1996