Family Happiness/When a Spouse Has Special Needs

Have a Balanced Schedule

"For everything there is an appointed time," wrote King Solomon.  (Ecclesiastes 3:1)  However, it may seem impossible to maintain a balanced schedule, given the disrupting effect that a chronic illness can have on a family's routine. What can you do to achieve at least a measure of balance?

Together you might take regular breaks from medical concerns.  Can you still enjoy some of the things you shared before illness struck?  if not, what new activities can you try?  It could be something as simple as reading to each other or as challenging as learning a new language.  Having a life together outside the illness will strengthen  your  "one flesh" bond-and increase your happiness.

Another aid to maintaining balance is being in the company of others.  The Bible states at Proverbs  18:1:  "One isolating himself will seek his own selfish longing; against all practical wisdom he will break forth."   Did you note in that verse that isolation can have an undesirable effect on the mind? By contrast, periodic association with others can lift your spirits and help restore mental perspective. Why not take the initiative to invite someone to visit you?

At times, balance becomes a problem for caregiving spouses.  Some take on too much work, slowly wear down, and endanger their own health.  Eventually, they may even render themselves unable to continue providing care for their beloved mate. So if you are taking care of a chronically ill spouse, do not ignore your personal needs.  Set aside regular quiet time to refresh yourself.   Some have found it therapeutic to talk out their anxieties from time to time with a trusted friend of the same sex.

TRY THIS: List on paper the obstacles you face in taking  care of your mate.  Then make a list of steps you might take to overcome these or to cope with them more effectively.  Instead of over analyzing them, ask yourself, 'What is the simplest, most obvious way to improve the situation?'

Next time: Family Happiness/When a Spouse Has Special Needs - Try to Maintain a Positive Outlook

From the jw.org publications