CHAPTER TWO - Preparing for a Successful Marriage

ARE YOU READY FOR MARRIAGE? 

Constructing a building may be expensive, but caring for its long-term maintenance is costly as well.  It is similar with marriage. Getting married seems challenging enough; however, maintaining a marital relationship year after year must also be considered. What does maintaining such a relationship entail?   A vital factor is a wholehearted commitment.  Here is how the Bible describes the marriage relationship:  "A man will leave his father and mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh."  (Genesis 2:24) Jesus Christ gave the only Scriptural basis for divorce with the possibility of marriage-"fornication," that is, illicit sex relations outside the marriage. (Matthew 19:9) If you are contemplating marriage, bear these Scriptural standards in mind.  If you are not ready for this solemn commitment, then you are not ready for marriage. -Deuteronomy 23:21; Ecclesiastes 5:4, 5. 

The idea of a solemn commitment frightens many.  "Knowing that the two of us stuck together for life made me feel pushed into a corner, closed in, totally confined," confessed on young man.  But if you really love the person you intend to marry, commitment will not seem like a burden.  Instead it will be viewed as a source of security.  The sense of commitment implied in marriage will make a couple want to stay together through good times and bad and to be supportive of each other come what may.  The Christian apostle Paul wrote that true love "bears all things" and "endures all things."  (1 Corinthians 13:4, 7) "The commitment of marriage makes me feel more secure,"says one woman.  "I love the comfort of having admitted to ourselves and the world that we intend to stick together." -Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. 

Living up to such a commitment requires maturity. Thus, Paul counsels that Christians do better not to marry until they are "past the bloom of youth," the period when sexual feelings run strong and can distort one's judgment.  (1 Corinthians 7:36)  Young people change rapidly as they grow up.  Many who marry when very young find that after just a few years their needs and desires , as well as  those of their mate, have changed. Statistics reveal that teenagers who marry are much more likely to be unhappy and seek divorce than those who wait a little longer.  So do not rush into marriage.  Some years spent living as a young single adult can give you precious experience that will make you more mature and better qualified to be a suitable mate.  Waiting to get married can also help you to understand yourself better-a necessity if you are to develop a successful relationship in your marriage.

Next time: Preparing for a  Successful Marriage/ARE YOU READY FOR MARRIAGE? 

From the book: The Secret of FAMILY HAPPINESS