How I Changed My Violent Ways

Undercover Mission

During my training in the foreign legion, I rashly volunteered for even more "adventure."  Once more, I knew nothing about where this step would lead me. I received commando-style training, which included handling all sorts of weapons and explosives.  For completion of the course, I was sent to Langley, Virginia, in the United States, where I trained with CIA operatives.

Before long, I was a member of an undercover commando group.  During the 1960's, I participated in dozens of secret missions.  I helped carry out operations against drug traffickers and arms smugglers in Central and South America. When we encountered these people, we were instructed to "liquidate" them. I am ashamed to say that I personally took part in such operations.  We never took prisoners, apart from those who could be interrogated for information.  

I was later assigned to spy on Spanish military leaders for the purpose of discovering those who had misgivings about the dictatorship of General Franco.  We also spied on opposers of the Franco regime who were living in France. The intention was to kidnap key dissidents and take them to Spain, presumably for the purpose of eliminating them. 

My final operation required me to organize a team of mercenary soldiers to pull off a coup d'etat in a small  African country.  We were instructed to storm the military barracks in the capital and then take over the president's palace.  As planned, we invaded the country in the middle of the night and completed our task in just four hours. Three of my companions died in the fighting, along with dozens of  "enemy" soldiers. I myself participated in this killing. 

This traumatic experience tormented my conscience. I could not sleep because I had constant nightmares in which I found myself slaughtering my enemies in hand-to-hand combat.  In my nightmares, I saw the petrified stares of the individuals I was about to kill. 

I resolved that I would never participate in another mission. So I returned all my documentation to the military and obtained a discharge. However, three months later my superiors summoned me again for further espionage. I fled to Switzerland, and several months later, my wife Encarnita-who was completely unaware of my work as a secret agent-joined me in Basel. 

Next time: How I Changed My Violent Ways - Bad Habits Die Hard

From the AWAKE!  magazine, 2011